How do you go back to watching the Vancouver Canucks after such a brilliant season, but such a "hopes dashed" finish? I'm torn. The fall TV line-up is less than stellar, otherwise I think I would have waited until the end of November to tune into the Canucks again. They have been a better December/January team than early fall, and I'm having trouble handling the losses. I know that Luongo hung in for his first win of the season during the last game, but the possibility of a loss was always there.
Besides, at the end of last season I had my hospital stint thrown into the mix of emotions that was happening around the playoffs, missed several games when I was on a ventilator, and was in hospital about 5 blocks away from the riot when it broke out. What were those people thinking? Let's give our city a black-eye for all of the North American hockey viewing audience to see? I could see the orange smoke from my hospital window and hear the helicopters circling overhead. The "code orange" alerts (mass casualties) rang every 15 minutes for most of the night, depriving us sick people of a decent night sleep. The poor nurses were rattled and weren't allowed to leave due to the code orange. Sigh.
So, do you cheer for the Canucks again, in hopes of them getting to the Stanley cup finals again, and hold your breath that the nitwits don't make their way downtown again on the last night? (Assuming that the city won't host a downtown venue again, the rioters spoiled that for the other thousands of people who just wanted to have a good time.) Or do you watch the Canucks reluctantly, with apprehension and less than the end of the year enthusiasm we all had in June. Well, I guess I'll just have to keep my fingers crossed and wish for fewer injuries, more goals, more wins and fewer shootouts. Wish. Hope. Sigh.
Monday, 17 October 2011
Friday, 2 September 2011
hummer
How do you line up in an orderly fashion to go through the car wash? Do you buy your ticket first and then get into line? Or, like this certain hummer (licence plate 471 KMD) in Vancouver today... park and block the line, while you buy your ticket? I have to admit, I have an attitude problem about hummers. And sitting behind this gold hummer that didn't even look like it needed a car wash didn't help. One tiny woman and this huge piece of steel... it just doesn't make sense to me. Especially in Vancouver, you know, where there are just so many steep, unpaved, muddy roads to be driven on (and this did not look like an off road hummer). And me with my Prius (and my ticket!), waiting for her to get her ticket and tapping my nails on the steering wheel... impatiently.
I think I actually got out of the car when she came back and said something snide like "oh, you're the one who is blocking the line!". The she said something back (you can imagine) that thankfully I couldn't hear because I had my car radio too loud and got into her gold hummer. So much for building patience, building up my karma points... I had been smug and annoyed and let her know. Then I shifted into feeling foolish for letting it get to me so much... childish, silly comment that I made to her.
So, as I was writing today, I was looking up a picture of a hummer to embellish this blog and low and behold... I found out that hummers are being phased out!!! Apparently they were not selling and GM wasn't able to find a buyer for them about 2 years ago during one of their government bailouts so ... I felt smug again. And then childish again. Sigh. But overall it is a good thing. Fewer big gas guzzling cars on the road, fewer hummer drivers (and their "everyone will just have to wait because I am a hummer owner and I deserve to be first in line even if I don't have a ticket" attitude) blocking the car wash. Do people who care more about the environment care more about others, think more about others, are less self-centred? Wait a minute... maybe I should have washed my car by hand? Or just left it dirty? Wash. Rinse. Dry.
I think I actually got out of the car when she came back and said something snide like "oh, you're the one who is blocking the line!". The she said something back (you can imagine) that thankfully I couldn't hear because I had my car radio too loud and got into her gold hummer. So much for building patience, building up my karma points... I had been smug and annoyed and let her know. Then I shifted into feeling foolish for letting it get to me so much... childish, silly comment that I made to her.
So, as I was writing today, I was looking up a picture of a hummer to embellish this blog and low and behold... I found out that hummers are being phased out!!! Apparently they were not selling and GM wasn't able to find a buyer for them about 2 years ago during one of their government bailouts so ... I felt smug again. And then childish again. Sigh. But overall it is a good thing. Fewer big gas guzzling cars on the road, fewer hummer drivers (and their "everyone will just have to wait because I am a hummer owner and I deserve to be first in line even if I don't have a ticket" attitude) blocking the car wash. Do people who care more about the environment care more about others, think more about others, are less self-centred? Wait a minute... maybe I should have washed my car by hand? Or just left it dirty? Wash. Rinse. Dry.
Saturday, 13 August 2011
summer
I'll be on hiatus for 10 days, off the grid, on a lake in Quebec. Canoeing. Swimming. Sun-soaking.
Thursday, 11 August 2011
secrets
How can you be honest when you're asked to keep a secret? It's awkward and challenging, guarding someone else's privacy. Especially when it's from other family members. I value being upfront and direct. It doesn't mean that I can always adhere to that, or that it's always a straightforward thing to do. When I was younger, it was complicated... I felt like I needed to lie to my mom to be able to grow up and branch out. But I desperately wanted to take my own risks that I didn't have to pass by her first. Those little white lies would just roll off my tongue. Once I hit adulthood, I had to work hard to break that bad habit. But, now it feels like "here I go again"... when asked to keep a secret, you end up lying by omission... and it's not very comfortable.
This flies in the face of trying to be scrupulously honest in one's life. Personally, I've found this life principle can have huge advantages. I don't feel like as much of an impostor as I did when I was younger... you know, that "impostor syndrome" when you worry all the time that one false move, and EVERYONE will see you for who you truly are, and it ain't pretty? Don't get me wrong, I don't want to brag about this or anything. It didn't come easily... it was hard work. But when I don't hide much from anyone, there are no secrets, no need to remember to whom I told what... it's strangely relaxing. Maybe some people find it(me) overwhelming... "TMI" and all that. But it quickly weeds out who in my life can handle that much info about me and who I am... and who can't. Like this blog, I guess. People who like what I have to say and want to hear more about me and my ramblings/opinions/musings read it, and those who think it's WAY too much information, just don't.
Secrets can do so much harm when in the wrong hands. Political secrets, secrets about abuse, incest, family secrets, government secrets... you name a group, they'll have a secret. And silencing someone has long been a tool in hands of those who have any kind power. The lack of transparency in governments, work places, and just about any locus of power drives me crazy! But I digress... back to secrets in families and being a part of that. I am really struggling with the usefulness or advisability of this. Everyone hits a time in their life where facing the music isn't pretty, but it's necessary. Secrets keep them from being fully known, warts and all... from knowing themselves better through their relationships with others through all this. I'm all for ripping the bandaid off and seeing how ugly it is underneath. As much as it hurts. Hair and all. Tug. Rip.Youch!
This flies in the face of trying to be scrupulously honest in one's life. Personally, I've found this life principle can have huge advantages. I don't feel like as much of an impostor as I did when I was younger... you know, that "impostor syndrome" when you worry all the time that one false move, and EVERYONE will see you for who you truly are, and it ain't pretty? Don't get me wrong, I don't want to brag about this or anything. It didn't come easily... it was hard work. But when I don't hide much from anyone, there are no secrets, no need to remember to whom I told what... it's strangely relaxing. Maybe some people find it(me) overwhelming... "TMI" and all that. But it quickly weeds out who in my life can handle that much info about me and who I am... and who can't. Like this blog, I guess. People who like what I have to say and want to hear more about me and my ramblings/opinions/musings read it, and those who think it's WAY too much information, just don't.
Secrets can do so much harm when in the wrong hands. Political secrets, secrets about abuse, incest, family secrets, government secrets... you name a group, they'll have a secret. And silencing someone has long been a tool in hands of those who have any kind power. The lack of transparency in governments, work places, and just about any locus of power drives me crazy! But I digress... back to secrets in families and being a part of that. I am really struggling with the usefulness or advisability of this. Everyone hits a time in their life where facing the music isn't pretty, but it's necessary. Secrets keep them from being fully known, warts and all... from knowing themselves better through their relationships with others through all this. I'm all for ripping the bandaid off and seeing how ugly it is underneath. As much as it hurts. Hair and all. Tug. Rip.Youch!
Friday, 29 July 2011
terror experiment update
Ok, so not to keep you in suspense, the experiment yielded interesting and unexpected results (read terror and terror 2 first to understand this entry). And as a true scientist, I am publishing my results and my rambling conclusions and you are free to draw your own as well.
So far, (I know, less that 24 hours) I have had 4 hits, all Canadian. Which leads me to draw the following possible conclusions:
1. Having already triggered all the Homeland Security, FBI and CIA filters I could trigger, they have deemed me safe, and aren't interested in following up with any planned teasing or retriggering on my part.
2. Americans have read up on compassion, fear mongering and black and white thinking since yesterday and are no longer afraid.
3. The 4 Canadian hits were from CSIS, and I need to repeat this experiment using words that might attract more hits from them.
OR...
4. The 17 hits from the States were some kind of fluke I wrote a whole blog about. How embarrassing.
So, next blog will be back to my usual format. Sorry to bother. Nothing ventured...
So far, (I know, less that 24 hours) I have had 4 hits, all Canadian. Which leads me to draw the following possible conclusions:
1. Having already triggered all the Homeland Security, FBI and CIA filters I could trigger, they have deemed me safe, and aren't interested in following up with any planned teasing or retriggering on my part.
2. Americans have read up on compassion, fear mongering and black and white thinking since yesterday and are no longer afraid.
3. The 4 Canadian hits were from CSIS, and I need to repeat this experiment using words that might attract more hits from them.
OR...
4. The 17 hits from the States were some kind of fluke I wrote a whole blog about. How embarrassing.
So, next blog will be back to my usual format. Sorry to bother. Nothing ventured...
Thursday, 28 July 2011
terror 2
How do you top having your first 17 hits in one day from America? OK, I'll admit it, I occasionally check my stats to find out who my audience is. I am flawd after all. Some info for those of you who were like me... blog illiterate until 2 months ago, your blog stats show who has clicked on your blog. So far, I've only told a few Canadian friends and some family I am blogging therefore most of my "views" are Canadian. I've also had some random hits from Germany, Cambodia, Malaysia and 2 from the USA. Until yesterday, that is. I guess all you need to do is write a blog about terror, bombs and fear to attract the attention of America. 17 hits! That's 25% of all my hits! Wow! So, I've decided to try again (daring aren't I?). Hence...duh, duh, duh... terror 2.
Unlike Norway on Friday, there haven't been any more acts of really bad terror in the last 24 hours. Oh wait, that's not true. Someone murdered the mayor of Kabul yesterday and an AWOL US soldier with bombs and Jihadi literature was just arrested near Fort Hood. And certainly, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert talk lots about terror on their late night shows. But I figure that I have to somehow work the words missiles, assassinations and mass destruction in these four meager paragraphs to see if I can score more American attention today. I am thinking... "does Homeland Security, the CIA and the FBI have some kind of filter that picks up crazy bloggers before they can actually blow things up?" If so, how come this guy in Norway didn't set off any alarms? How did they miss that and find me 17 times?
That's why I've decided I'll do this just this one more last time... you know, just enough to tease them but not enough that they come knocking at my door. A theory. I have my personal ethics after all. I'm not THAT crazy a left-wing extremist. Just to test out this theory... what's your wager? More, fewer or the same hits as yesterday? What kinds of words are they looking for? Explosive device? Terrorism? Shoe? Underwear? OK, OK, I can hear my friends warning me that that's enough. But I do also wonder if it's just that these are the kinds of words some run-of-the mill Americans are googling? That's an even bigger question!
To answer that query, I lean toward the teachings of Micheal Moore and South Park. I believe there is a culture of fear. You can be born with black and white thinking but it can also be taught. Can it be un-taught? Only time will tell. I'm an optimist (oops, there's a little bit of personal info that slipped out there). Google "grey thinking or thinkers", there is lots of info out there about this topic. Meditation and compassion training actually change your brain structure... for the better! (sorry if that scared you.) So, here's to all the grey thinkers of the world. Wisdom can come at any age. Hip. Hip. Hur-grey!
Unlike Norway on Friday, there haven't been any more acts of really bad terror in the last 24 hours. Oh wait, that's not true. Someone murdered the mayor of Kabul yesterday and an AWOL US soldier with bombs and Jihadi literature was just arrested near Fort Hood. And certainly, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert talk lots about terror on their late night shows. But I figure that I have to somehow work the words missiles, assassinations and mass destruction in these four meager paragraphs to see if I can score more American attention today. I am thinking... "does Homeland Security, the CIA and the FBI have some kind of filter that picks up crazy bloggers before they can actually blow things up?" If so, how come this guy in Norway didn't set off any alarms? How did they miss that and find me 17 times?
That's why I've decided I'll do this just this one more last time... you know, just enough to tease them but not enough that they come knocking at my door. A theory. I have my personal ethics after all. I'm not THAT crazy a left-wing extremist. Just to test out this theory... what's your wager? More, fewer or the same hits as yesterday? What kinds of words are they looking for? Explosive device? Terrorism? Shoe? Underwear? OK, OK, I can hear my friends warning me that that's enough. But I do also wonder if it's just that these are the kinds of words some run-of-the mill Americans are googling? That's an even bigger question!
To answer that query, I lean toward the teachings of Micheal Moore and South Park. I believe there is a culture of fear. You can be born with black and white thinking but it can also be taught. Can it be un-taught? Only time will tell. I'm an optimist (oops, there's a little bit of personal info that slipped out there). Google "grey thinking or thinkers", there is lots of info out there about this topic. Meditation and compassion training actually change your brain structure... for the better! (sorry if that scared you.) So, here's to all the grey thinkers of the world. Wisdom can come at any age. Hip. Hip. Hur-grey!
Wednesday, 27 July 2011
terror
How do you deal with the likelihood that a terrorist(s) will strike in Canada at some point? It's a hard thing for me to get my mind around. Everyone loves Canada, right? When we were students hitch-hiking across Canada, sewing the Canadian flag on your backpack was considering a very smart this to do. Now that all the American students do it too, it's lost it's value. You're more likely to get mistaken for an American masquerading as a Canadian (and having to put up with the disdain that follows that), (or at least suspicion). So, as we fight side by side with the Americans and NATO in the middle east, how is our world profile now? We used to be peace-keepers. Not sure about that anymore.
Then out of the blue on Friday there was Norway. I always thought of Norway as a peace-keeping country too. Out of the way, keeps it's nose clean. In the first few hours after the bombing in Oslo and the massacre on Utoya, it was most commonly thought that Muslim extremists were behind the death toll. The pundits must have been wildly typing away on Google to come up with reasons for "why Norway?". Then the story unfolded... a Norwegian right-wing crazy. Some will judge me for using the "c" word. But really, it's what we all think when we use the word "extremist". Some will judge me for using the word crazy in the same sentence as "right-wing". Sigh. More on that in another blog.
Then... THEN...there was Stephen Hume in his column on Saturday, July 23 in the Vancouver Sun wanting to warn us that Canada was not immune from attacks either. He told us "[we] are of high value as terror targets... precisely because so many of us don't really believe we are". Now, Stephen Hume is one of my favorite columnists in The Sun, so it was quite a shock to realise I disagreed with him. Lots of Vancourites believe we are potential targets. Maybe if you live on a Gulf Island (oops, I guess islands aren't safe anymore, are they?) instead of Vancouver proper, you don't think about terrorist attacks. But in Vancouver, the people I hang out with think about it lots. There are riots here and surveillance cameras. We had the Olympics and lots of security. That was to protect us from what... joyous Canadians? No, it's because there could have been a bomb at any minute. A lot of us know that "something wicked is bound our way". But, what kind of a life is that to live... to be in a perpetual state of fear? Is it a guy thing... to have not been aware that Canada is a potential target? I think it's possible to not be an ostrich, but not be a gun-toting, electric-fence building, fear mongerer either. Women have always known this... don't let your fear keep you from going out at night but keep your wits about you. Live each day, be in the moment. Observe. Breathe. Be.
Then out of the blue on Friday there was Norway. I always thought of Norway as a peace-keeping country too. Out of the way, keeps it's nose clean. In the first few hours after the bombing in Oslo and the massacre on Utoya, it was most commonly thought that Muslim extremists were behind the death toll. The pundits must have been wildly typing away on Google to come up with reasons for "why Norway?". Then the story unfolded... a Norwegian right-wing crazy. Some will judge me for using the "c" word. But really, it's what we all think when we use the word "extremist". Some will judge me for using the word crazy in the same sentence as "right-wing". Sigh. More on that in another blog.
Then... THEN...there was Stephen Hume in his column on Saturday, July 23 in the Vancouver Sun wanting to warn us that Canada was not immune from attacks either. He told us "[we] are of high value as terror targets... precisely because so many of us don't really believe we are". Now, Stephen Hume is one of my favorite columnists in The Sun, so it was quite a shock to realise I disagreed with him. Lots of Vancourites believe we are potential targets. Maybe if you live on a Gulf Island (oops, I guess islands aren't safe anymore, are they?) instead of Vancouver proper, you don't think about terrorist attacks. But in Vancouver, the people I hang out with think about it lots. There are riots here and surveillance cameras. We had the Olympics and lots of security. That was to protect us from what... joyous Canadians? No, it's because there could have been a bomb at any minute. A lot of us know that "something wicked is bound our way". But, what kind of a life is that to live... to be in a perpetual state of fear? Is it a guy thing... to have not been aware that Canada is a potential target? I think it's possible to not be an ostrich, but not be a gun-toting, electric-fence building, fear mongerer either. Women have always known this... don't let your fear keep you from going out at night but keep your wits about you. Live each day, be in the moment. Observe. Breathe. Be.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)