terror experiment update

Ok, so not to keep you in suspense, the experiment yielded interesting and unexpected results (read terror and terror 2 first to understand this entry). And as a true scientist, I am publishing my results and my rambling conclusions and you are free to draw your own as well.

So far, (I know, less that 24 hours) I have had 4 hits, all Canadian. Which leads me to draw the following possible conclusions:
1. Having already triggered all the Homeland Security, FBI and CIA filters I could trigger, they have deemed me safe, and aren't interested in following up with any planned teasing or retriggering on my part.
2. Americans have read up on compassion, fear mongering and black and white thinking since yesterday and are no longer afraid.
3. The 4 Canadian hits were from CSIS, and I need to repeat this experiment using words that might attract more hits from them.
OR...
4. The 17 hits from the States were some kind of fluke I wrote a whole blog about. How embarrassing.

So, next blog will be back to my usual format. Sorry to bother. Nothing ventured...

terror 2

How do you top having your first 17 hits in one day from America? OK,  I'll admit it, I occasionally check my stats to find out who my audience is. I am flawd after all. Some info for those of you who were like me... blog illiterate until 2 months ago, your blog stats show who has clicked on your blog. So far, I've only told a few Canadian friends and some family I am blogging therefore most of my "views" are Canadian. I've also had some random hits from Germany, Cambodia, Malaysia and 2 from the USA. Until yesterday, that is. I guess all you need to do is write a blog about terror, bombs and fear to attract the attention of America. 17 hits! That's 25% of all my hits! Wow! So, I've decided to try again (daring aren't I?). Hence...duh, duh, duh... terror 2.

Unlike Norway on Friday, there haven't been any more acts of really bad terror in the last 24 hours. Oh wait, that's not true. Someone murdered the mayor of Kabul yesterday and an AWOL US soldier with bombs and Jihadi literature was just arrested near Fort Hood. And certainly, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert talk lots about terror on their late night shows. But I figure that I have to somehow work the words missiles, assassinations and mass destruction in these four meager paragraphs to see if I can score more American attention today. I am thinking... "does Homeland Security, the CIA and the FBI have some kind of filter that picks up crazy bloggers before they can actually blow things up?" If so, how come this guy in Norway didn't set off any alarms? How did they miss that and find me 17 times?

That's why I've decided I'll do this just this one more last time... you know, just enough to tease them but not enough that they come knocking at my door. A theory. I have my personal ethics after all. I'm not THAT crazy a left-wing extremist. Just to test out this theory... what's your wager? More, fewer or the same hits as yesterday? What kinds of words are they looking for? Explosive device? Terrorism? Shoe? Underwear? OK, OK, I can hear my friends warning me that that's enough. But I do also wonder if it's just that these are the kinds of words some run-of-the mill Americans are googling? That's an even bigger question!

To answer that query, I lean toward the teachings of Micheal Moore and South Park. I believe there is a culture of fear. You can be born with black and white thinking but it can also be taught. Can it be un-taught? Only time will tell. I'm an optimist (oops, there's a little bit of personal info that slipped out there). Google "grey thinking or thinkers", there is lots of info out there about this topic. Meditation and compassion training actually change your brain structure... for the better! (sorry if that scared you.) So, here's to all the grey thinkers of the world. Wisdom can come at any age. Hip. Hip. Hur-grey!

terror

How do you deal with the likelihood that a terrorist(s) will strike in Canada at some point? It's a hard thing for me to get my mind around. Everyone loves Canada, right? When we were students hitch-hiking across Canada, sewing the Canadian flag on your backpack was considering a very smart this to do. Now that all the American students do it too, it's lost it's value. You're more likely to get mistaken for an American masquerading as a Canadian (and having to put up with the disdain that follows that), (or at least suspicion). So, as we fight side by side with the Americans and NATO in the middle east, how is our world profile now? We used to be peace-keepers. Not sure about that anymore.

Then out of the blue on Friday there was Norway. I always thought of Norway as a peace-keeping country too. Out of the way, keeps it's nose clean. In the first few hours after the bombing in Oslo and the massacre on Utoya, it was most commonly thought that Muslim extremists were behind the death toll. The pundits must have been wildly typing away on Google to come up with reasons for "why Norway?". Then the story unfolded... a Norwegian right-wing crazy. Some will judge me for using the "c" word. But really, it's what we all think when we use the word "extremist".  Some will judge me for using the word crazy in the same sentence as "right-wing". Sigh. More on that in another blog.

Then... THEN...there was Stephen Hume in his column on Saturday, July 23 in the Vancouver Sun wanting to warn us that Canada was not immune from attacks either. He told us "[we] are of high value as terror targets... precisely because so many of us don't really believe we are". Now, Stephen Hume is one of my favorite columnists in The Sun, so it was quite a shock to realise I disagreed with him. Lots of Vancourites believe we are potential targets. Maybe if you live on a Gulf Island (oops, I guess islands aren't safe anymore, are they?) instead of Vancouver proper, you don't think about terrorist attacks. But in Vancouver, the people I hang out with think about it lots. There are riots here and surveillance cameras. We had the Olympics and lots of security. That was to protect us from what... joyous Canadians? No, it's because there could have been a bomb at any minute. A lot of us know that "something wicked is bound our way". But, what kind of a life is that to live... to be in a perpetual state of fear? Is it a guy thing... to have not been aware that Canada is a potential target? I think it's possible to not be an ostrich, but not be a gun-toting, electric-fence building, fear mongerer either. Women have always known this...  don't let your fear keep you from going out at night but keep your wits about you. Live each day, be in the moment. Observe. Breathe. Be.

music

How do you find a place for music in your life, in this hectic, fast paced life we lead? And why would you do that anyway? Music is such a huge part of most teenagers' lives. I remember buying my first rock album, Alice Cooper. You know, the one with the bloody picture of Alice hanging from a noose? Freaked my mom right out... she was sure I'd gone over to the dark side, started doing drugs etc. Of course, that wasn't the case at all. But gone over to the dark side of music? Sure I had.

But that's part of the point, right? Music has a lot to do with identity. Here I was moving from Carole King (mom acceptable) to bloody, anti-school rock and roll (not). She was never able to see the virtues of this new "noisy" music I was playing on my purple and hot pink record player (where is that record player now, I wonder?). I thought it was sad, quite a loss for her. After all, my grandmother had to put up with her move from Jim Reeves to Elvis?!? didn't she? And then, what would I do when my kids started to listen to music I didn't like? Would that happen to ... gasp... me too?

Well, I've gotten lucky in a way. Hip hop became the "new" music, and as far as I can tell, no-one in the house likes it! My kids listen to Pink Floyd, and Eric Clapton. (other newer stuff too of course) They've introduced me to Green Day, Jack Johnson, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Arcade Fire. I joined a rock band in September (well, a rock band lesson) and am finally putting 8 years of classical piano lessons to good use. I may buy an electric guitar this week. My band teacher says "there is no better fountain of youth than rock and roll" and I totally believe him. Music increases endorphins when you are anticipating a musical passage that you particularly enjoy. It's also a great workout as I found out during my first lesson back. So, find music that you like and kick back. Mellow, blues, folk or rock. Turn it up as you please (and as your neighbours can tolerate). Relax. Unwind. Rock-on.

doctors

How do you know how good your doctor really is? I've had a lot of contact with the medical profession over the last 2 months. With waiting lists for most appointments, it's hard to be choosy. But I've found there are quite a wide variety of people and personalities who end up in the medical profession. And it's not all good. (it's not all bad either). Kind, compassionate caregivers to dismissive, rude know-it-alls. Also hard to take are the smooth, slick talkers who pretend to know stuff, but really don't. Almost laughable.

But... you're at the whim of whomever happens to snag your chart as you walk into the emergency room. Be polite, give your history as clearly as you can, don't be afraid to be assertive. None of this guarantees the outcome of your choice. After waiting 5 hours for a chest xray that had been promised (and may have prevented my ICU admission), I was told that no xray was going to happen, and left. It's hard not to end up doubting yourself when you feel unwell, but the doctor knows best. Right? Or the time 2 days earlier when I was admitted after a very scary ambulance ride because I couldn't breath, only to be diagnosed as "psychiatric" because I'd had 2 1/2 drinks and was babbling... likely a delirium from the sepsis I was just about to come down with. Where's House when ya need him???

But being the optimist that I am (and with the encouragement of a very wise friend of mine) I kept going back to this very same hospital and wound up being seen by one of the good ones. Who did the right tests, finally did the xray, referred me to the right specialist, basically saved my life. Met lots more of them over the next several weeks. Amazing, caring nurses too. Some of the better doctors apologized... we're all human aren't we? This is the reason I teach first year medical students year after year. Their very first interviewing course. How to take a history. How to listen to patients. How to make a diagnosis 80% of the time by talking to the patient. How to treat patients with respect, empathy and compassion. See the patient seeking help from you as individual with an illness, not as the "non-cardiac chest pain in bed 3". When I teach again this September, I'll have quite the story to tell. What to aim for, things to avoid. Take the extra time to think outside the box. Every so often, things are not what they seem. How you want to be treated. Care. Listen. See.

debt

How do you cope with debt these days? Being off work recovering (and having been off on sick leave for a few months last summer), it's hard not to accumulate some debt. Not a good time to be in debt, for sure. Interest rates are said to be on the rise. Luxuries have had to go. No dinners out, pedicures on hold (although I am suffering through this, as is anyone who has to look at my feet), vacationing in my back yard (not too hard to take with this Vancouver weather). I do have some coupons for free dinners, a spa gift cert left over from Xmas and a credit with WestJet so I can go back east in August and stay for free at my mom's cottage. These are all fairly painless decisions for an individual to make. And I am luckier than most.

But... what is that big country to the south of us to do with their debt crisis? The one where they will start defaulting on their loans if they don't have refinancing by August 2nd. And... today is July 10th. If I was that close to defaulting on my mortgage, I'd be panic stricken! Cuz' they really do take your house away! And what are they doing in congress? On the news (if what they say is to be believed), there's something of a standoff going on. Instead of working together to solve this ginormous problem, they are digging their heels in! On one side.. "no tax increases"... on the other side... "no cuts to social programs". Nobody's budging.

Maybe one side is waiting for the other side to blink first. What I'd like to know is who are they going to default to? Who holds all that debt? Not much info in the news about that, is there. My guess is that the Americans don't really want anyone to know the answer to that question. For me it's easy... one bank, just down the street. I know the manager and the tellers. But who do the States go to if they need an extra day or two because they are still stale-mated? I am assuming someone knows the answer to that question. This affects the whole world, you guys. So, I strongly suggest you get your act together and soon. Even Greece figured this one out. Because really, how can you be a world power if you can't meet a debt ceiling deadline. Look each other in the eye, go out for a nice long candlelit dinner and get to know each other as human beings. Give. Take. Blink.

tabloids

How do you walk past those tabloids at the check-out stand without looking at them? It's tough! I try and try and still those cellulite photos draw me in. It feels voyeuristic to me, and doomed to a nasty end... like a moth to a flame. Disasters on TV news do that to me too. The BP oil spill last year, the devastation of tornado alley this spring, floods just about anywhere near a river these days. Can't turn them off. But tabloids are a man-made disaster of immense proportions careening out of control, and when will it end?

In Britain, the tabloids have taken to hacking into dead peoples cell phone records, all in the name of selling their rags. Selling advertising space that is. Agonizing parents thinking their children are still alive are given false hope because their phones are still being accessed. Kidnapped children, dead soldiers. Haunting alcohol and drug addled LA stars is one thing, but tormenting parents of dead children? Now I've heard that one such rag will shut it's doors. Out of shame or to avoid the big lawsuit headed it's way?

I also hear tell that one such "newspaper" had the gall to comment on the the wardrobe of the Duchess of Cambridge... as if it is a fashion faux pas to wear the same pair of jeans 3 times in public on a 10 day trip to North America.  I'd call that smart packing! They get away with preying on everyones' insecurities. If they are going to publish and judge the "swimsuit worthiness" of some of the most photographed stars in the world... just where does that leave the rest of us poor slobs? Better buy those papers and check out the latest diets? Wrong! The only way they will ever go away is if we STOP BUYING THEM! (Spread the word!) Somebody buys them... and as much as I am bored at the checkout stand and can't look away, it's not me. Time to educate our youth (and our mothers and friends) about how to turn a blind eye. These newspapers have as much power as we give them, and if they aren't selling, their advertising revenues will dry up. So vote with your pocketbooks.  Resist. Ignore. Save.

heat

How do you enjoy the summer weather (finally!!) in Vancouver? I am still on the mend so I have really enjoyed being warm, not shivery, touring all the growing vegetation in my garden and soaking up a few rays (with sunscreen of course). Sun comes out and it's really easy to forget it was ever raining. TV weather people are forgiven (because it's all their faults, after all), Hawaii shirts are on display, and all of Vancouver's hottest patios are making money again.

So what is with these silly people leaving babies and dogs in cars and SUVs??? Is the sun emitting "Let's Forget the Living Creatures in the Heat" rays? Are we so sun-deprived that people have gotten out of the habit of looking after their puppies and little ones? Yeah, it's way easier to not drag out the stroller, especially when the kid is sleeping. And if ya come upon a hot locked car with a sweaty, screaming child or a panting pouch, ya call the police, right? Well, think again... yesterday, an RCMP officer left a 10 month old police dog in training in a police SUV in the heat on Vancouver Island! That will really help to build trust in the RCMP. Great role-modeling there, officer!

Luckily some good Samaritans passed by in all these cases, and like yesterday, saved the pup (and babes). I really liked the "portable tent-tarp and hosing down the SUV" idea. Quick thinking and brilliant. So, folks, lets all enjoy our burst of summer for as long as it lasts, but keep your thinking caps on at the same time. Maybe a boat ride you've paid big money for isn't worth a dead dog. Don't drink and drive or boat or leave the baby in the car. Watch the toddlers in the inflatable pools. Wear sunscreen. No regrets. Think. Sweat. Enjoy.

age

How do you cope with the steady advance of time, and all the slow degradation of the body and mind that goes along with it? I woke up one day and all of a sudden I was 50 (that was a few years ago). Like, when did that happen? I didn't feel 50, but my body was sure telling me I wasn't 25 anymore. Arthritis in the knees, so no more running, no more double black diamond runs, hips, backs... when will the losses end?

At least men have Viagra. That way at least a large part of them feels like when they were 25! And with a lot of focus, that swelling can can contribute to a sense of well being and youth. At least that's what the commercials say. What fountains of youth do we women have? Well, I guess we have estrogen et al, with all of the controversy that entails. Feels a bit like Russian roulette. Now the "Wise Ones" are apparently back on the side of using HRT (hormone replacement therapy) if you have symptoms that are driving you crazy (and no risk factors), for up to 5 years. Time to the next flip-flip? ...stay tuned!

My mother gave me good advise... always have a good number of younger friends, otherwise when you're older, you won't have anyone to hang out with.  (I'll save her advise about plastics and the Wolf Blitzter botox regime for another blog) Along with hormones and younger friends, as corny as it may sound, is that ever important "state of mind". You know what I mean. Don't act your age, don't go softly into the night, don't dress your age. Get a younger, non-judgemental friend or daughter to take you shopping. Music is important at any age. Find a few new bands who are writing new music THIS decade and buy their music. Work your brain, learn a new skill, write a blog (oops, gave that away didn't I), exercise, don't give up sex. You're only as old as you feel. You're only young once. Ache. Stretch. Grow.

beds

How do you keep all the different uses of beds straight? There's sleeping, of course. Then there's sex, napping and snoring. You can do exercises in bed, watch TV in bed (although not recommended if you have trouble falling asleep) and bring your lap top to bed. Slumber parties, pillow fights and wrestling matches... all this to just name a very small few. One more I'll include in here is common lingo in and amongst a group of women friends I hang out with... MIB. (man in bed) (not to exclude having anyone else in your bed, it's just that most of us are heterosexual)

This used to be the favorite excuse (ok, my favorite excuse) to not show up on a Saturday morning for a run and coffee. Teasy, kinda showy. (being sick with a doctor's note... boring, dull, yawn) New secrets and tidbits to be shared the following week. Sometimes the excuses would go on for weeks, dragging out the suspense. Of course, the excuse was supposed to be used only once, to hold the group together... as attendance was of the utmost importance.

Now that we're older and wiser, we've come to realise that a lot more holds us together than just attendance records. A weekly group of running and coffee friends for close to or over 20 years now... although I stand to be corrected. Outlasted my first marriage. Lots of sharing happens in 20 years. Now that we are all a whole important relationship older, there's a reprise of MIB happening. Haven't kissed a new man in 20 years? Tea light sex? Who's ever heard of that? New beds. New moves. New skin. New pillows. New pillow buddies. Bliss. Angst. Chills.